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Thursday, May 26, 2011

The 'M' word

I get a lot of flak on a daily basis for moving across the country with a guy I'm not married to.  You know, the usual people that are concerned about my well being: my family, my friends, my boss, my dentist...  For a long time, I had told Karl that a ring on my finger was the requirement to moving to Alaska.  Then I decided to throw that out the window for a couple of reasons:

1. It didn't look like marriage was on the table at any point in the future  (My paraphrasing of Karl's response to the question of marriage is "sometime in the future down the road maybe."  If that's not non-commital, I don't know what is..)
2. I've always made decisions in my life based on some master plan I've devised.  Make the right choices about everything.  Always be responsible.  Don't take risks.  And look where all of that planning and thoughtfulness has gotten me - my life is nowhere near what I thought it would be and I don't even have anything exciting to show for it.

So, I've decided to change things up.  Don't get me wrong, I would very much like to be married, but I'm trying to not stress myself out about something I don't really have any control over.  If it happens, it happens.  I'm more concerned about being with someone who supports my choices in life, no matter how bizarre they may be.

For someone that doesn't generally like change, I'm going all out.  And if it means making some choices that other people don't agree with, then so be it.  Really, what's the worst that can happen?  I move back to PA?  Oh my gosh, I will have had an amazing life experience - what a tragedy!  Best case scenario, I make some serious changes that make me happy.  Worst case, I go back to the way things were.  Doesn't sound too unreasonable to me.


  1. It sounds like you have processed this and came up with a solution that you are comfortable with and that my friend is the most important thing of all! I am inspired by your risk taking and I'm here to cheer you on!

  2. Wow, can you imagine the flak you'd get if Grandma was still alive? Holy crap, I can't even imagine--she once told me I wasn't legally married because I didn't change my name. I say do what makes you happy--you can't make everyone happy all of the time, so take care of yourself. :D


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